Cinematical’s Friday Night Double Feature: The Wee Ones & Big Ones of Football

Monika Bartyzel
Filed under: Sports, Home Entertainment, Trailers and Clips, Friday Night Double Feature

Super Bowl Sunday, which happens to be my favorite sporting event of the year, is almost here, so of course, this double-feature is all about the pigskin. There’s a ton of football movies to choose from, but I’m going for my personal favorites. This match-up gives you some of that youthful, heart-tugging vigor combined with some troubled, adult ball play. I’m talking about the ever-cute and spunky Lucas, followed by The Program. I could’ve picked Rudy, and gone totally saccharine, but football — it ain’t about the soft cuddlies! It’s manly men grunting and knocking the crap out of each other. It’s tough! It’s rough! And, while the sport might use too much padding, you can’t appropriately prepare for the big football day with 216 minutes of soft, feel-good drama. However, you can get away with a little less, if you top it with enough testosterone.

Grab the corn nuts, sit back, and enjoy!

Lucas

Before Corey Haim fell to drugs and reality television, he was the cutest kid to ever run on a football field — Lucas. At 14, Lucas is a smart, nerdy boy with a big heart. However, unlike many of history’s uber nerds, two of his close friends happen to be a really cute girl (who he has a huge crush on) and the hottie from the football team. Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, Lucas’ friends fall for each other, and the young tyke sets out to prove his worth on the football field, which is a really, really bad idea. But hey, we do crazy things for love.

It’s far from the most realistic high school movie out there, but it’s got heart, and while the geek doesn’t get the girl, at least he gets the slow clap. (Who came up with that ridiculous thing anyway!?) Haim was great as Lucas, and had some of the best lines to show up in an ’80s film (check out a few of them below), as was Kerri Green as his cute, cheerleader paramour, Charlie Sheen as the boy who stole her away, and Winona Ryder as the best friend who never shares her true feelings. (If only Rina let him take the girl on the perfect date, maybe she would’ve gotten the diamonds in the end.)

Trivia:

Charlie Sheen filmed his cameo in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off during the production of Lucas.
Courtney Thorne-Smith beat out Ellen Degeneres for the role of Elise.
Kirk Cameron was up for the role of Lucas.

Don’t you call me a piss ant!

Lucas teaches Bruno about erections.

Oh, how they fall…
The Program

Note: Shockingly, YouTube and the other usual trailer hotspots have no trailer up for The Program. So, here’s a picture.

This is the night of Craig Sheffer on Cinematical. At least, it is in my sports-related posts. Sure, I consider him one of the studs of sports flicks, but The Program is also an entertaining look at the drama behind the sports — not the romance like Lucas, but the pressures of hard university football playing. The film follows a group of players who are all struggling with the pressures of high-profile college football. Sheffer’s Joe Kane is both a star quarterback and alcoholic; Omar Epps’ Darnell Jefferson is an upcoming star struggling with the education side of the university scene; and Andrew Bryniarski struggles with the strength needed for serious football by going wild with the steroids.

But we can’t forget Abraham Benrubi. I imagine his name doesn’t ring bells, but if you’re a fan of Parker Lewis Can’t Lose, you know Larry Kubiak. There’s also some pretty notable women in the film — the vampire-slaying Kristy Swanson, the chased Joey Lauren Adams, and Oscar-winner Halle Berry (how far she has come!).

Darnell’s mood-lifting TD.

Lattimer celebrates making starting defense in an… interesting way.

Lattimer goes crazy again, this time with some makeup.

It’s not the big words that make you smart.

Source: Cinematical’s Friday Night Double Feature: The Wee Ones & Big Ones of Football

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