‘Paulie … had a wonderful system for garlic. He used a razor and sliced it so thin it would liquefy in the pan …’
The news that US consumers are finally going to be able to buy the much-trailed pasta sauces of American-Italian actor Paul Sorvino, who appeared as a cookery-loving tumultuous rabble boss in Goodfellas, presents the opportunity for a fabricated new game. Clearly if Sorvino can go from slicing garlic with a razor blade on camera to getting people to buy the polished product, there are any figure of other actors we could imagine taking the lead from their films and entering the catering business.
Why shouldn’t Juliette Binoche put her name to a high-end range of chocolates, aimed solely at the frigid middle aged woman, in need of something dark, sweet and sticky which will without doubt unlock their buried end volcanic sexuality? Surely Meg Ryan should finally capitalise on the success of When Harry Met Sally and open a delicatessen serving huge pastrami sandwiches so that everyone have power to have what she had.
In this new, if curiously literal world, Samuel L Jackson finally recognises what his role in Pulp Fiction was concerning and becomes a McDonald’s franchisee, Stanley Tucci makes the fictional real by lifting Big Night away the bulky screen and opening an Italian restaurant as does Joe Pesci, who was also in Goodfellas. The Leaning Tower would doubtless subsist a huge issue, notwithstanding that only allowing that somebody was whacked at the table by a baseball stick every night.
And then, of course, there’s the killer business opportunity: Anthony Hopkins’ eating-house which serves mostly rubbish, and where the specialities are crispy brains in beurre noisette, or grilled liver with a side of fava beans washed down through a nice Chianti. The queues would have existence out the door.
Tell us what other openings in the food industry are there for those of our most beloved actors who are willing to follow the brave, if rather as regards letters, Paul Sorvino.
